OK, so there's baseball to talk about after all. Thank you, Chris.
I wouldn't have laid down odds on Boston's sudden love affair with Tony Graffanino. I could see this coming from a mile away. The abuse heaped upon Mark Bellhorn (who is just as responsible for that red flag in center field as anybody) has been so predictably overblown that the mere thought of Tony Graffanino makes me want to vomit. The existence of a pro-Graffanino movement among the Boston media and the shark-jumping Sox fans tells me beyond a shadow of a doubt that being pro-Graffanino is bad. Bellhorn may be struggling, but I'd rather have a competent Bellhorn than a faux-plucky Graffaffafino. Everyone is conveniently forgetting that Graffanino's typical offensive performance is more along the lines of Bellhorn's current nightmarish performance... Bellhorn at least has a chance to improve.
Tony Graffanino is little more than a big-market broadcaster's wet dream... "awwwww, I just love this guy, he does all the little things, he plays the game the way it was meant to be played, blah blah blah." Pure, utter, uncut BS. He wasn't so adorably scrappy when he was Kansas City's second baseman, doing absolutely nothing for a shitty team. Speaking of plucky guys, what was the name of that plucky guy on the Sox last year who "did all the little things to help the team win"? Oh that's right... we didn't have one.
We had Mark Bellhorn though. You may remember him from such game-winning home runs as "Game 6 against the Yankees" and "Game 1 against the Cardinals." Game-winning home runs!!! In the middle of an embarrassing slump, he stepped up and decided two crucial games all by himself. Would Graffanino have done that? Absolutely goddamn not. At best, he would he have bunted his way on, stolen second, and waited for a teammate to drive him in... which is not only more work than just hitting the goddamn home run, but also passes off responsibility for winning the game to the next guy at bat. No thanks. I'll take the guy who can win it all by himself.
I wouldn't have laid down odds on Boston's sudden love affair with Tony Graffanino. I could see this coming from a mile away. The abuse heaped upon Mark Bellhorn (who is just as responsible for that red flag in center field as anybody) has been so predictably overblown that the mere thought of Tony Graffanino makes me want to vomit. The existence of a pro-Graffanino movement among the Boston media and the shark-jumping Sox fans tells me beyond a shadow of a doubt that being pro-Graffanino is bad. Bellhorn may be struggling, but I'd rather have a competent Bellhorn than a faux-plucky Graffaffafino. Everyone is conveniently forgetting that Graffanino's typical offensive performance is more along the lines of Bellhorn's current nightmarish performance... Bellhorn at least has a chance to improve.
Tony Graffanino is little more than a big-market broadcaster's wet dream... "awwwww, I just love this guy, he does all the little things, he plays the game the way it was meant to be played, blah blah blah." Pure, utter, uncut BS. He wasn't so adorably scrappy when he was Kansas City's second baseman, doing absolutely nothing for a shitty team. Speaking of plucky guys, what was the name of that plucky guy on the Sox last year who "did all the little things to help the team win"? Oh that's right... we didn't have one.
We had Mark Bellhorn though. You may remember him from such game-winning home runs as "Game 6 against the Yankees" and "Game 1 against the Cardinals." Game-winning home runs!!! In the middle of an embarrassing slump, he stepped up and decided two crucial games all by himself. Would Graffanino have done that? Absolutely goddamn not. At best, he would he have bunted his way on, stolen second, and waited for a teammate to drive him in... which is not only more work than just hitting the goddamn home run, but also passes off responsibility for winning the game to the next guy at bat. No thanks. I'll take the guy who can win it all by himself.
posted by Jeff at
3:03 PM
3 Comments:
Don't forget, not only does every team need a plucky do the little things white guy (see St. Eckstein, and yeah, I played the race card), but they also need an ancient lefty who they pay way too much money to occasionally get a single out (see St. Franco). In those respects, the Sox are now a complete team, as they've just pulled Remlinger straight from the nostalgia file. Bravo, Epstein.
That said, I'll trade you my Tony (Womack, you POS) for yours straight up.
Sign the deal!
By
Alex, at 3:25 PM
Sorry Lehr, no deal. I just like talking to salesmen. Besides, I like when you call Womack YPOS.
Also, I'd like to point out that St. Louis employs a non-white plucky guy in So Taguchi. (Or, as Chris Berman would call him, "So Taguchi-GALPA!" ) However, he is the exception to the rule. Not every team needs a plucky guy.
In conclusion, David Eckstein is the fucking Antichrist, and I'm OUT!
By
Jeff, at 4:22 PM
OK. Alls I'm saying is that I will have serious difficulty warming up to Tony Graffanino due to the fan/media idiocy that he symbolizes. These are the same retards who were screaming for Pokey Reese in the playoffs last year. Who ended up being right back then? Same shit, different day. Does anybody realize that? Of course not.
I just don't get why Mark Bellhorn is so uniformly reviled. Kevin Millar has FOUR home runs, not to mention a baseball IQ lower than my shoe size. Why isn't anyone booing him??? What does everyone else see in that dip?
By
Jeff, at 5:00 PM
Post a Comment
<< Home