Postgame Spread
You guys hangin' out? I'll hang out.

Friday, November 10, 2006

Next time come strapped with a motherfucking pamper    

Hm... apparently pretty much everyone in the NBA and NFL are packing heat. (free registration required).

Oh, and so is Carl PavaNOOOOO!!!! For Carl, it's definitely a good idea. Another scary thought is that 1 in 23 people in Massachusetts are licensed to carry a firearm. That's pretty frightening. Also frightening is to imagine inhabiting Javon Kearse's head for a day:
"Jevon Kearse of the Eagles, whose brother, father, grandfather, uncle, and cousin all died in separate incidents of gunshot wounds"

Yikes.

In light of this report, how long before athletes start showing off their pieces on "Cribs"? And anyone care to bet that Clinton Portis rolls with a pearl-handled derringer or or some shit?

In fact, this'll be fun. Let's guess the gun each athlete might own:

Clinton Portis: Pearl-handled derringer
doRA: Desert Eagle .50 (to make up for emotional deficiencies elsewhere)
Gilbert Arenas: CA. 1800 single-shot dueling pistol
Charles Oakley: Just the two guns God gave him, sonny
Sal Fasano: .38 special w/ duct tape handle
Peyton Manning: His laser, rocket arm

1 Comments:

  • Don't let my erratic behavior fool you. I'm not representative of all Boston fans. Very few of us are actually prepared to go Lonny Baxter on your ass, Yankee-lover.

    I also don't think A-Rod would have a Desert Eagle .50. Based on the memorable scene from Snatch, don't you think it's more likely that A-Rod would the one packing a replica? Jeter's the one with the Desert Eagle.

    By Blogger Jeff, at 4:22 PM  

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